Heaven’s Cataract – Part 5

Some thoughts: Finally! back to the story haha. I want to finish this man. its dragging too long.

Ok storytelling time!

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THE WANTS AND THE WANTED

 

People can be divided into many categories. Two such categories are the people who want others and those who are wanted. Kyle was caught in the middle. A child borne by a beautiful woman would surely be beautiful as well. Kyle couldn’t help but notice that he’s been receiving stares, from boys and girls alike, every now and then. And then he realised he couldn’t stop staring at Amber either. During one of the meetings Kyle stared at Amber so much that Mike, Kyle’s good buddy, had to ask him to focus countless times.

 

Kyle lamented at the fact that he hadn’t really done anything for his portfolio because the only thing he had ever done at the meetings was to ogle at Amber. He wanted to quit and concentrate on his studies, but he longed to see Amber as well.

 

Through hearsays and gossips, Kyle got to know Amber a little more. She was actually in her 40s (Oh dear! Kyle thought. Women these days are good at preserving themselves.). Kyle felt cheated but he still liked Amber anyway. But knowing that she’s more than 2 decades older than him slowly shifted his desire onto something else. Instead of sexual, the kind of want that Kyle felt towards Amber was more akin to a child wanting his mother. The very few conversations that Kyle managed to have with Amber – because Amber always seemed to be busy with something – though, revealed nothing about Amber being a mother before.

 

But Amber is hiding something. Kyle thought. It’s gotta be more than work that’s keeping her single.  

 

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‘CON ARTIST’ 

 

Amber knew how to hide her secrets well. She had become a skilled deceiver, deft at the art of concealing her past and the truth. Even when Kyle had approached her, talked to her, asked her about her background, she never gave herself away. She had watched her body language, chose her words carefully, and made sure not to give any hint that they were in any way related. She even made sure to eliminate any chances of having any conversation with him by busying herself with random stuff.

 

But somehow Kyle seemed to be onto something. Why was he always staring so intently at her during the meetings? Why was he always delving into her past every time they talked? Amber kept reassuring herself that she had not let herself away, and that she was just thinking too much. But she still couldn’t shake off the feeling tugging at her that Kyle knew something. Was he here because he knows I’m here? Amber questioned rhetorically. All her questions led to no answers unless she asked Kyle himself.

 

But seeing Kyle in a renowned university gave Amber some sense of motherly pride as well. Of course, she knew she wasn’t the one who made him who he was today; she wasn’t there to groom him, and Amber felt ashamed of that. But knowing that her son was well and healthy put her heart at ease. Amber didn’t feel worthy enough to acknowledge him since she had absented herself from a huge part of his life. Just knowing that he’s doing well would be good enough.

 

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GIVING UP 

 

‘I’m quitting.’

 

Amber overheard Kyle talking to Gordon in his office when she was walking to the conference room with her coffee and files. She stopped dead in her tracks, and she stopped so suddenly that she almost spilled her coffee onto her lilac dress. She quickly put her coffee down on a nearby empty table and regained balance. While pretending to be rearranging her files at the same time, she strained to listen to the rest of the conversation.

 

‘But why?’ Gordon’s gruff voice seeped through the office door. ‘I thought you’ve been doing well.’

 

‘I need to go back to my studies. This is taking up too much of my time.’ Kyle had rehearsed his excuses in his mind over and over before he had arrived in the office. Of course it’s all just bullshit; Kyle topped the cohort yet again the last semester.

 

Gordon shot him a doubtful look, and Kyle quickly regurgitated his next line: ‘I want to do better than what I’ve done for the last semester, and I know I could have, if not for this.’

 

Gordon sighed. ‘I see. A perfectionist, eh? Well, I guess it can’t be helped. I’ll grant you your wish, then.’

 

‘Thank you so much. And I’m really sorry.’

 

‘No apologies, please. Your time is much appreciated.’

 

Amber’s line of vision was fixated at the same page on her document all the while, her mind in a whirlwind of thoughts. Would she never get to see Kyle again after he quit? What excuses should she come up with if she wanted to meet him in the future? How to not raise his suspicions when asking to meet him, given that they hadn’t had much interactions?

 

Her thoughts were interrupted when Gordon’s door opened and Kyle, her own creation, stepped out. They both jumped when they saw each other.

 

Kyle took the initiative. ‘Erm, hi.’

 

‘Well, hello, there. What were you doing in Gordon’s room?’ Amber pretended not to have heard anything.

 

‘Well, I decided to quit the whole thing.’

 

‘Oh, I see.’ Amber didn’t need to put up a sad face.

 

‘But, erm, we’ll see each other again, yeah?’ Kyle’s optimism picked up fast.

 

‘Yeah, definitely.’ Amber replied absently.

 

‘Erm, Amber, can we talk?’

 

‘Huh?’

 

‘Like, in private.’

 

Amber was taken aback by his request, but she recovered quickly. Her womanly pride that helped gained Gordon’s confidence in her work performance took possession of her and she rejected Kyle immediately and instinctively without thinking.

 

‘Sorry, no, I have work to do.’

 

Kyle looked dejected and… pitiful. Amber’s maternal instincts quickly took over.

 

‘Well, just for 5 minutes, then.’

 

Kyle was immediately elated. It was almost child-like. Amber suddenly felt like time had turned back, to the time when her son was only 5….

 

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About Kimono Party Girl

I was born and bred in Singapore for the first 20 years of my life, and then I decided that even after flying all over the world as a flight attendant, life is still too boring. So, in search of more adventure and add spice to my life, I quit my job, packed up, and left for Japan - which is, to me, the promised land. I've always been fascinated with Japan ever since I was 8, thanks to Ayumi Hamasaki, aka the Britney Spears of Japan. She's the first J-pop singer that I have been obsessed with, and my first contact with the Japanese language was through her lyrics. Yup, I first learned my Hiragana from her song 'I am'. But what really sealed the deal was my first trip to Japan in 2010. The fresh air, the beautiful cherry blossoms, the endless fast fashion trends and the awesome food was what made Japan the land of my dreams, and it had since become my goal to one day live, work and party in Japan. So after working like a horse as a flight attendant for 2 years and saving up a decent amount, I made a big leap of faith and moved to the land of the rising sun. I have studied one year of Japanese and two years of graphic design. Currently, I'm in the midst of shukatsu (就活 - job hunting). Wish me luck!
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