The Reverse

To all my friends, especially the guys: can the reverse of a relationship – such as starting with sex instead of holding hands – actually happen? Can an affair as such actually be regarded as a relationship?

In a supposedly normal relationship – that means starting out with holding hands – the guy usually starts out with more enthusiasm than the girls (correct me if I’m wrong). The girl gets more into the relationship later, by then the guy’s enthusiasm would have burned out, which results in a mismatch in expectations from both parties and thus, perhaps a breakup.

But how does the other type of relationship (let’s call it type B) work? Can it actually be successful and lead to marriage (if marriage were to be considered a successful end result of a relationship)?

In my opinion, even if the guy has an initial enthusiasm to know the girl more, he would find that it’s meaningless to do know the girl if he’s already gotten her. For the guy to really see the girl as a potential spouse, the girl has to put in extra hard work than in the first type of relationship because it is more difficult to confirm the guy’s feelings towards her in type B.

So why do girls still engage in type B? Is it because they have mixed up sex with love? It may sound silly, but it is highly possible with girls, knowing that they attached emotions with almost everything. So if a girl were to engage in type B, she has to be cautious and to keep an objective mind and throw all emotions out.

Unless anyone has a method to make type B relationships easily successful, I think it’s less of a hassle for us girls to take the conventional route. At least we know what the guy is thinking about, and we’re in more control.

Do share if you have an idea!!


About Kimono Party Girl

I was born and bred in Singapore for the first 20 years of my life, and then I decided that even after flying all over the world as a flight attendant, life is still too boring. So, in search of more adventure and add spice to my life, I quit my job, packed up, and left for Japan - which is, to me, the promised land. I've always been fascinated with Japan ever since I was 8, thanks to Ayumi Hamasaki, aka the Britney Spears of Japan. She's the first J-pop singer that I have been obsessed with, and my first contact with the Japanese language was through her lyrics. Yup, I first learned my Hiragana from her song 'I am'. But what really sealed the deal was my first trip to Japan in 2010. The fresh air, the beautiful cherry blossoms, the endless fast fashion trends and the awesome food was what made Japan the land of my dreams, and it had since become my goal to one day live, work and party in Japan. So after working like a horse as a flight attendant for 2 years and saving up a decent amount, I made a big leap of faith and moved to the land of the rising sun. I have studied one year of Japanese and two years of graphic design. Currently, I'm in the midst of shukatsu (就活 - job hunting). Wish me luck!
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